So… Hi.

So…

Hi.

I know, lame way to start… but I’m not sure how to start after 6 months of not saying anything.

I’ve been thinking about you all a lot recently, trying to decide whether I can bridge the gap between blogging and, well, not blogging. And also deciding whether I have anything worth saying? I already know I either need to blog a lot or not at all because I can’t seem to find the right balance of just doing 1 or 2 every couple of weeks, before I know it- 6 months has gone by.

But I still use WordPress, I still read other blogs and today a little notification popped up to say I’d been the proud owner of Amy Who for two years…

Two whole years.

Wow.

When I think back to who I was then and who I am now, it’s a big change. Okay I look the same, sound the same but I don’t act the same, I don’t feel the same.

I’ve been thinking about how I’ve changed a lot recently because this Friday I get the keys to my brand new house. A house that I will happily be sharing with Mr Amy Who and our plans to fill it with a puppy and who knows what else in a few years and I feel so happy and yet really sad about spreading my wings of this flat.

Practically- a one bedroom flat with no storage and an increasing amount of black mould is not where I want to be but this flat is me. I came into it a totally broken girl with no money, no real career, no life, a broken down relationship and I’ve grown into a woman that can survive and live. A woman who can be brave enough to go abroad exploring by herself, who can pay her own bills, who can advance her career. And okay, that was down to me, not the flat but I was here when I experienced all that. When I clicked the confirm button on the flights to Barcelona, when I’ve come home and cried about a really hard day, when I’ve annoyed the neighbours with my constant singing.

So maybe I’d run out of things to say because I didn’t have much to moan about…

That’s not a bad place to be.

But it’s time for a brand new start. I’m going to be moving to a house, with stairs! I’ve not had to navigate stairs in my own home for 3 years. Sure, I have to use stairs to get to my front door but then I’m done, sorted. It’s only a quick stumble from the living room to the bathroom but now…

Well now it’s not that easy!

I’ve got a garage and a garden and I’m thinking about the flowers I want to plant. I couldn’t keep the little herb garden in my kitchen alive so I’m not sure what hope they’d have but the thought is there.

I’m going to have my own dressing room! I’ve claimed the box room for my own and it’s going to be my little sanctuary. Because you need that when you live with a boy.

He can have the garage.

And we’re planning for our little puppy. He wants a Husky, I want a Cockapoo so anyone know of something in between? It will hopefully be joining our lives later this year so watch this space.

And work is changing for the better (I think) but more on that later… There’s a whole other blog about that.

Which means they’ll definitely be another blog.

Lets do a work blog and then a house tour, ease myself in gently.

So…

Hi.

Here’s to starting again!

The Turkey’s Gone Tits Up

Is it too soon for a Christmas related blog?

Please, the first of January isn’t too soon for a christmas related blog.

The best thing is that Mr Amy Who loves christmas as much as me! The only time we’ve spoken to each other since the first of November is to have conversations about Christmas. My Pinterest board is getting a little out of control, I’m swooning over cute little decorations and have already started wrapping my presents…

But there’s one little sticking point.

You see this year- we have to plan. And clean. And it’s already started.

There’s two reasons for our Jedi/Ninja levels of organisational skills…

Numero Uno- Mr Amy Who works in retail and this happens to be the busiest time of the year so weekend days off are a rarity whereas I never work weekends! Therefore we have currently planned everything Christmas related into the 6th of December where we’re going to brave Meadowhall, Ikea & the Range…

All in one fricking day.

Then we’ll celebrate with a roast on Sunday…

Numero Dos- We’re hosting Christmas.

Oh my Lord, I have no Idea what we’ve signed up for….

Sorry, I just used the royal ‘we’ there. I mean I have no idea what Mr Amy Who has signed us up for.

Now we don’t just get the fun tinsel covered Christmas. We also get the ‘lets not burn the turkey and the house down dear’ Christmas!

It’s pressure!

Mums are fine- Mums have been cooking Christmas dinners since the dawn of time. This is not the job of a 23 year old who cannot master Yorkshire puddings and a 30 year old who doesn’t cook much.

Pray for us.

Well pray for him if this all goes wrong. It’s fine for me, if it goes tits up I can zoom down the A59 and be at my mums in time for turkey sandwiches and a leftover roast potato.

Shit Loads Of Glitter & Black Mould

I felt the need to blog!!!!!!

Nobody say anything! You might scare it aware!

I don’t have a lot to say really though. I’ve not been very well recently which is my biggest news. I’ve been suffering with a lot of headaches and tiredness. It’s doing head in (literally!) and I’ve now been prescribed some super duper migrainey tablet things to take so hopefully they’ll work a treat.

In other news- black mould. Or to describe it as Mr Amy Who does ‘the enemy I don’t understand.’ Our lovely drafty flat really is being attacked by the mould and we’ve no idea why. This did not happen last year and I’m doing nothing different with windows being open/heating being on etc and we’re not sure how to tackle it. We keep finding it appear overnight in the most random places… like a tea light holder! Apparently the Mr is going to war with it on his day off tomorrow and we will never see mould in this place again. But as it’s the enemy he doesn’t understand does anyone have any tips?! We’ve got mould/mildew spray but is there anything that can stop it appearing in the first place?

Finally, I don’t care- I am starting to feel festive, my birthday is over, the other half’s birthday is over, it’s halfway through November (more or less) and therefore I’m itching to do some Christmas crafting! I have signed up to do an arts/craft fair at the end of the month selling some prints that I’ve been designing of late and hopefully that will go to plan cause I’m imagining many christmassy prints with shit loads of glitter all over them!

Here’s a sneak peak of one for you… Don’t steal it!

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I’m currently in the process of setting up an Etsy page for it, I shall let you know when I do (look at me making future blogging plans)

I was thinking to reintroduce myself into the blogging world I might do some kind of 25 days of Christmas blog….but I did blooms last year and, even though I can talk for England about Christmas, I think I covered it all then? Give me ideas as to what I should do!

See You Soon. I Just Don’t Know How Soon.

I’ve left my laptop open, on this page for the last two hours in the hope that inspiration would come and bop me on the head. It didn’t.

And still hasn’t.

However, it’s been a while and everything all ended rather abruptly didn’t it? I thought I owed it to everyone, and myself, to actually write something.

You all saw my consistency in blog posts falter in the couple of months prior to me going AWOL and the truth is I just got tired of the guilt of not writing, tired of trying to fit in blog posts into my suddenly busy life. Introducing someone new into my life meant the few evenings a week I had to myself, I wanted to savour that time and then the time I spent with him- well I didn’t want to cut that short by having to fit in a blog post. But mainly it was because my life was busy with things I didn’t want to share- good things were happening but it was all mine and I liked that. Blogging filled a gap in my life when something was missing and when that gap was filled the last thing I wanted to do was blog about it.

But I’d just spent the last year blogging about every detail of my life and maybe I will get back to that one day but, for now, I don’t want to do that.

However, just so you can all be safe in the knowledge that I’m happy and surviving here’s a run down of what I’ve been up to….

I got the job. Well- I got the job for 6 months and then we’ll see where we go from there. It’s stressful, pressured, annoying and very rewarding. I have a very mixed bag of emotions about the whole thing.

Things are still going well with Mr Amy Who- he now spends more time in my flat than anywhere else that we’ve decided he should move in.

I have turned 23- As I fall further into the boring non-milestone ages I realise you don’t get the same sense of excitement about your birthday. However, as I got tickets to see Lionel Richie, I am safe in the knowledge that my 23rd birthday was one of the best. Ever.

I have bought a car. Finally- I have my own little piece of heaven in the form of my 55 plate, red/orange Renault Clio- who I have named Ariel. She has been mine for all of one week but now I don’t know how I ever survived without her. It opens up a whole new world- IKEA is now an accessible place to me.

As I have a car I am now into buying CDs again- they aren’t as readily available as they used to be. Woolworths needs to make a comeback.

I’m very much into ‘shabby chic-ing’ my furniture right now. Annie Sloan paint is a God send.

Other than that, life has been ticking along in pretty much the same fashion that it did before. I’m happy and settled and just getting on with my life- so I’m not sure what has made me not want to write about it.

I do want to still keep blogging but in a very low pressured way. If I don’t have anything to say for a couple of weeks I don’t want to feel like I have to churn something out. That was the pressure I was putting myself under and when Mr Amy Who appeared and life became a lot fuller (more full?) – well, something had to give!

To be honest I just want to find my own little niche to blog about- still talking about my life but maybe in a different way, like sharing recipes or talking about how I painted the bargain £8 chest that I found in a charity shop. I don’t know yet, I will find something and this blog post is by no means a goodbye, it just may be a ‘see you soon. I just don’t know how soon.’

So to sum up- I will be back and, to be honest, I’ve always still been here. I still read a lot of the blog posts from the people I’m following and I still love to know about your lives so please do as I say and not as I do- you keep writing!

Year 2 Blog 19- Genie, You’re Free

I’ve been staring at this empty blog page for about an hour…

I know I want to write but I just don’t know what I want to say. I guess I’ve fallen out of the habit of pouring my heart out on to my little blog- which is okay, I don’t want this blog to be a place where I very rarely post anything and then when I do it’s a whingy little blog…

So I find out about the job tomorrow.

I’m trying not to over analyse and to be honest- I have no idea what the outcome will be tomorrow and therefore people are telling me not to worry about it because I can’t change anything now- the interview’s done- and whatever the result is I have to live with that, so why bother worrying until I know and even why bother worrying when I do know.

It’s not as simple as that.

I don’t often talk about work on my blog and while I’m not going to go into the ins and outs of it all tonight- I’ve never known me be so willing to throw myself completely out of my comfort zone for something like I have with this. I feel like it’s made me really grow as a person- being responsible for the welfare of 10 people 5 days a week is a lot of work but it can be so worthwhile.

I’m just scared that, as of 11am tomorrow, I might lose all of that.

Ok- it’s not like, if I don’t get it, I’m getting chucked back on the phone tomorrow but I will know that it’s coming to an end. And okay- it’s not a permanent thing, nothing is, but with the amount of people they’re hiring and the amount of people starting to do manager progression stuff at work- I wonder when my next opportunity will come about.

I’ve been saying for the past couple of days that I couldn’t have done anymore on Tuesday so whatever comes about tomorrow is Ok because I know it’s not down to me not being prepared but I think I’m lying to myself because, when you put that much effort into something, it makes you want it even more.

This week has just been a funny old week with lots of stuff going on and I don’t quite know how i feel about all of it. Maybe I am over reacting by worrying but I wish people would stay ‘stop worrying, there’s no point’ it’s not like I come up to you and say ‘stop being so chilled out, there’s no point.’ It’s no different to me, I’m a worrier- it’s how I process things- I like to analyse what I’ve done and what other people have done- it’s how I learn and grow. I’m working very hard to really let the things go that I can’t control and simply focus on the things that I can but it’s a journey for me and it’s not going to happen overnight. If chilled out people want to be all hippy and relaxed about everything then brilliant, do that because it’s your thing but it’s not my thing and I’m really starting to get tired of people making me feel bad for trying to process my own thoughts in my own way.

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Deep breaths- it’s out. It’s been a while since I’ve ranted and whether I’ll actually press publish (if you’re reading this I think it’s safe to assume I did…) because I think I just needed to get it all out of my head.

To be honest, I think it’s just one of those weeks where I need my mum but she’s busy making a lemon drizzle cake that I can’t have because it’s 60 miles away, damn you lemony goodness!

I’ve not had an oven for 5 weeks so I can’t even make one myself…

Don’t rent if you don’t have to kids! I’m not really too bothered about the whole ‘dead money’ thing, at the end of the day I have a roof over my head, but having to rely on a flipping landlord when things go tits up…

The struggle in my life is real… #firstworldproblems

So yes- not that my entire destiny will be influenced by this but if you’re lucky enough to have fingers and toes maybe you could cross them for me tomorrow morning?

And, as a side note, I know I’m very late to this but…

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Year 2 Blog 18- Hire Me Eyebrows

Okay, so tomorrow is D Day…

Or I day…

That doesn’t work, fine! It’s my interview tomorrow! And I’ve never been so nervous yet so determined at the same time, it’s like having a lot of power but no idea how to use it!

I don’t know that people are understanding the pressure I’m feeling that a year of work on being a manager is coming down to how well I can talk about what I’ve done for an hour. I mean, lets be honest, we all know it can take me hundreds of words to get to my point…

And that’s on a blog, where I have the opportunity to think and to edit….

I can’t edit what I’ve just said- it’s already out there!

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However I don’t know why I’m worrying… I’ve got this whole thing sussed.

It’s all about eyebrows!

Wait! Hold your judgement! Hear me out!

A good pair of eyebrows can say a lot about a person- they’re well put together, they take pride in themselves….

And! My boss always has impeccable eyebrows, she will look at me and think ‘I can relate to her! Lets give her the job’

Therefore I’ve plucked moulded my eyebrows into the perfect ‘hire me’ shape. So while I’m talking I’ll just wiggle my eyebrows a few times (not in a weird way, just a ‘hey, remember we’re here’ kind of way)

It’s like a respectable version of using your boobs to get out of a speeding ticket! Which, if I get the job, I may have to try cause I’ll be able to afford a car!

I was also getting myself into a little bit of a state at work- the pressure was just building and building whilst I was doing some prep- another manager had to tell me to get a grip! If my life was an American sitcom (which would be so cool) he would have slapped me for being hysterical!

So I got a grip and then went and continued my interview prep, this time using coloured pens which made me extremely happy.

So to sum up- I have power that I don’t know what to do with so I’ve channeled it through my eyebrows and, really, I’m still a child.

As I just spilt some of my dinner on my top I can definitely confirm I’m still a child…

Wish me luck!

Year 2, Blog 17- It Wasn’t Even My Mother!

It seems Yorkshire had reverted back to the normal British summer time of not knowing what to do with itself. I’m sat here like a drowned rat after getting caught in a major downpour but I’m boiling…

What is this madness?!

Guys, I feel bad. Lots a new things are happening and you weren’t the first people I told, my mother wasn’t even the first person I told. I know what you’re thinking…

‘Amy you’ve changed!’

I have changed! And I like it, I’m happier, I’m busier but doing better things, I’m not losing weight right now (Don’t even get me started on how much I know I need to sort this out!) I feel like my life is more rounded. But you guys are getting left behind. I do love you, I promise. Maybe I should give you my number so you can bombard me with texts telling me to bl0g. Although it would only be all fun and games until the mental person got hold of my number and then we’re all for it cause they’d stalk me and kill me and then there’d be no more blogging from Amy who!

Maybe I’m over thinking things but best keep my number private just incase.

So lots of things have been happening recently- my parents have gone to Amsterdam to eat space cakes for the weekend, I’m getting a new oven, I’ve got an interview, I bought some very daring cushions with the word ‘hello’ on them…

It’s all happening in the world of Amy Who!

I have finally got an interview- same place, same job, it’s just an interview to make the managing gig permanent. It’s on the 12th of August so keep your fingers crossed for me. I’m already so nervous! Mr Amy Who (oh yes, he’s been upgraded! Not that we’re getting married but it seems he’s sticking around!) doesn’t understand why I worry. I don’t understand how he can’t! He’s very laid back and doesn’t tend to worry about anything, a nice balance since I tend to worry about everything but I feel like this is worth worrying over! I’ve put almost a years work into getting to this point and now it all comes down to 2 hours on the 12th of August….

That’s pressure!

The other thing that causes pressure- getting a 50th birthday present for my dad. A.k.a the man who has everything. Seriously- he has everything! I’ve had plenty of heated discussions about why a man doesn’t need an xbox 360 and a ps4 and doesn’t need a Bose speaker and a Sonos speaker… I just don’t understand it! But as he’s 50, I thought some effort needed to go into this….

Well!

Not only have I come up with a good idea, I’ve searched high and low to find the things I need to put it together, been caught in torrential downpours outside The Range and I’ve dropped part of it on my foot!

Seriously, I’m going to write out to all my nearest and dearest to inform them to stop having birthdays.

I joke! I jest! I was caught in a downpour but it’s not been that stressful. I just hope he likes it!

But that’s all that is happening in the world of Amy Who at the moment (so not a lot?) but I want to know how all you guys are getting on. I’m not going to keep making promises to blog more because, well, who needs the added guilt?! I am silently reading other peoples blogs but I so need to get back into it….

I knew I should have bought the chalkboard memo board at the Range, I would have put a reminder on there and then I definitely  maybe possibly would start to blog more